The Saladification Process

So it seems that Joey and I have different salad expectations. This difference became apparent when Joey said he would pick up stuff for a salad for dinner one evening. I opened the refrigerator to get the salad stuff out and I said "Hey, where's all the stuff to make the salad? All I see is the lettuce." His reply: "Oh it's in there." Me: Where? And he pulls out celery and green onions. Ummm...wait, where's the rest of it? Now, this is taking the term "green salad" to it's limit. My dream salad would contain romaine lettuce, tomatoes, avocados, red onions, black olives, and feta cheese. Herein lies the problem: he's a salad minimalist and I'm a salad maximizer. We're currently troubleshooting and working on a salad fusion. Thankfully, due to early detection, we can prevent this conflict from wreaking havoc on our marriage. :)